My words at the funeral of my mother's mother, held yesterday (Thursday, November 15, 2007) after her death on Sunday, November 11. It was a joyful occasion, to the glory of God.
My name is Chip Crush. I’m Paka and Grandma’s grandson; I’m Pat’s son. I want to mention five things that have come to mind in the past couple days, and then I’ll close with a story.
First, I think back to my childhood growing up on the small farm practically next door to Grandma and Paka, Pam and Steve, and Duke and Becky. And I think about what fun that was, riding my four-wheeler around the property. But I have to confess to the family here, I didn't really have the highest opinion of the Koenig family. I always thought that they, with the exception of my mom, were a little strange. Whenever we’d get together for birthdays and holidays, which seemed like every other weekend (too often, in other words), the Koenig’s were loud and messy. They always stayed too long at our house. Or if the gathering was at another family member’s house, we always had to stay too long, because nobody would ever leave. Don’t get me wrong. The Koenig’s were always kind and friendly. But they were a rowdy bunch.
The second thought I had brought me several years closer to the present, to a different perspective on the Koenig family. I now see the Koenig family as genuine. They are a real family. They don’t hide or pretend. What I once considered boisterousness, I now see as the joy of experiencing real life, which comes with ups and downs. It is the life of family. The Koenig’s are the same with each other as they are with others. What you see is what you get.
I’ll elaborate a little more as I go on, but the third thing I thought about was the reason for my change in perspective. It can only be as a result of experiencing God’s grace bestowed on me through the hearing and receiving of the message of the Gospel. Romans 5:8 declares the simple truth of the Gospel: “God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
For someone who has seen the hideousness of their own sin, especially compared to the holiness of God and His requirements, for someone who has experienced the salvation of the Lord, for someone who confesses that Jesus Christ is Lord, and who believes in their heart that God has raised Him from the dead, the gospel is a perspective-changing, mind-transforming, gracious power. Many of you in this room know that from personal experience. Others have heard about that but have no idea what it’s really like because you haven’t experienced yet. Maybe you want to. It’s as simple as trusting Christ, but it’s also as difficult as trusting Christ. Others of you, perhaps, know nothing of that reality, and don’t even want to. 1 Corinthians 1:18 says that “the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” I don’t think Grandma would mind me asking you to think about that. Have you received Jesus Christ? Have your sins been washed away? Has God’s grace changed your perspective?
It has mine. So from my early perspective, apart from Christ, I saw the Koenig family as strange, because they were strange. I was seeing them as the world might see them. And the word to describe it is foolishness – I was foolish – because they had experienced the gospel where I had not. But now, having experienced the perspective-changing, mind-transforming grace of the gospel, I hope that the world sees me as strange too, because we are strangers in this world. This world is not my home. Nor is it home for the Koenig family. It wasn’t Grandma’s home either. She was just visiting, as we are. And even in this time of mourning from the worldly perspective, there is a real sense of joy from the heavenly perspective that I know we who trust in Christ all share. And the reason that those of us in this family who share that faith in Christ rejoice in spirit is because Grandma prayed for us.
She was a prayer warrior. My aunt Becky said to me the night Grandma died that she prayed us all into the kingdom. And that’s true. I remember a sweatshirt that my mom painted for Grandma as a Christmas present one year. It had a duck swimming upstream, probably chasing some ducklings or something. But the caption read, “The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.” And that was Grandma. She was always busy. And she was always behind. She was flustered a lot, if I remember correctly. But I doubt she was ever behind in her prayers. Philippians 4:6-7 says, “In everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” I’ve got to believe that Grandma did just that – and experienced God’s peace as a result.
I've been studying Philippians rather intensely for about 4 months now, and I have thought of Grandma throughout the study. Philippians 1:21 says, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." That's Grandma. In Philippians 3:19-21, the author, Paul, contrasts unbelievers with believers. He says first of unbelievers, "Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things. But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables Him to bring everything under His control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like His glorious body." I know that Grandma will have a body free from disease.
You know, Paul’s letter to the Philippians is about joy in suffering. It’s about living for Christ. It’s about humility and serving others. It’s about contentment and prayerful selflessness. And Grandma, at least from what I saw of her in my reflections, was that kind of person. She is “God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for her to do” (Ephesians 2:10). And her work, produced by faith, is done. And now she has entered God’s eternal rest.
The fourth thought that came to my mind has been an ongoing thought. I want to say what a fabulous witness to the love of Christ Paka has been throughout the past few years. He exemplifies the Philippians traits as well, and he has lived up to what Ephesians 5:25 commands a husband. “Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her.” He has been a servant of his wife in her illness, and I’m sure it was a challenge. But I’m also confident that he did it out of love and would be willing to keep it up if he could. Thank you Paka for your example of selfless service, humility, and the love of Christ.
The fifth thought I’ve had has also been on my mind for much longer than the few days since Grandma went to be with Jesus. My prayers for Grandma have likely not been aligned with many of yours. I know that, as Christians, we are never to give up on the healing power of God through the prayers of His people. I could cite countless examples of healings that have taken place in the dimmest of circumstances, healings that could not be explained by modern medical science. Yet they can and are attributed to God’s grace through prayer. But I’ve been praying for mercy, motivated by Psalm 116:15, which says, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”
Grandma was a saint. She belonged to God. She was one of His saints. And her death is precious in His sight. She is with God now, which is exactly where He wants her, and so her death is precious to God. It ought to be precious to us as well.
The word matron is most commonly used in wedding ceremonies, but the word simply means, “A married woman marked by dignified maturity.” I don’t know that Grandma would have been considered “dignified” by the world’s standards, but I am certain that we who knew her would be comfortable giving her that title. God, who exalts and gives grace to the humble, has blessed us all by giving us a matron of honor. For Paka, she was a wife and companion; for her five children, she was a mother and servant; for the many grandchildren, she is an example to follow; and for God, she is His beloved child come home, a true and faithful worshipper and co-heir of all things with Christ Jesus (Romans 8:17). Job 1:21 says, “The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.”
Finally, I want to close with a short story. In 1871, the Great Chicago Fire consumed the life savings of a lawyer named Horatio Spafford. After losing his only son that same year, he made arrangements for his family, including his wife and four daughters, to travel to Europe for rest and regrouping. Something came up and Spafford had to postpone his voyage, but he sent the family on ahead of him. The ship sank in the Atlantic and his four daughters drowned. His wife survived and sent him word of the tragedy. When Spafford made the trip to meet his grieving wife in England, he sailed over the sight of the shipwreck, and in the midst of his sorrow, he wrote a song that has comforted many grieving people: “It is Well With My Soul.” Allow me to read the lyrics:
When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blessed assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.
I wish you all peace, the kind of peace that Horatio Spafford had, the peace that only comes when we trust God in everything that comes our way. We who trust Jesus know deep within us that, no matter where we are in this life, no matter how difficult the path ahead may be, we can be comforted by the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, in believing the words of our Lord and sincerely say, “It is well, it is well with my soul.” Let’s pray.